Really, it doesn’t matter at all.
I quipped to my DIL the other day while on the phone that it would really be nice to have a conversation with someone other than the Dog [Charlie] or another Demented adult.
That is why I was going to join the camera club and that was why I was going to join a gym. Charlie is a good listener so really, I cannot complain about him. He whines for a walk and likes to go with hubby for his ‘driveway’ walks.
My MIL is getting progressively worse again. The legs are swelling, Helping Hands calls me constantly to ask me to run over and get her weight or to fix this or that. Truly I have enough to handle here some days. Road trips for hubby to see a neuro surgeon, Speech Therapy and Psychology each week via TeleHealth, Oncology follow ups…Ring Ring!
“Hey can you drive your MIL to the ER?”
“No, I am on the highway half way to Madison.”
“We have to have your MIL’s weight daily. Can you come and get her meds, we have an order to change them…”
“Um, no, I am at her apartment now unloading her groceries and putting them away for her.”
My MIL told me I had the wrong car. She told me that she wanted her handicap sticker that expired earlier this year. I said it was expired. She said it isn’t. I am bringing her expired sign to her later today. Yesterday her daughter called while I was helping her put on her compression stockings and she told her daughter that I hadn’t been around.
See? There is no arguing with Dementia.
Hubby got angry over something stupid and little the other day. He uncharacteristically got sarcastic and mean. I walked away and shrugged.
Vascular Dementia can manifest in short outbursts of anger. He was happily watching a cop show on Netflix when I came back in the house. And pleasant as peaches.
Don’t feel bad for me, just learn a bit from me if you ever have to deal with a person who has dementia or other brain issues. This is not how I envisioned spending my later years, caring for people, but I guess I won’t stop.
Helping Hands really does try. But there is a huge shortage of home health care in rural areas. It won’t get better. By the time I need home health assistance? Well we can only guess as to what may happen then.
Next week we go for another consult with another neuro surgeon.
I ask the question yet again as does my husband. What about Quality of Life? They don’t know if the anyuerism will burst, they do know it got bigger. Fix the problem so he can continue a longer spiral into dementia? Or do the surgery with a high risk of blood clots, strokes, brain damage, and long recovery?
I’m going to take Charlie for a walk while all is quiet. The sun came out and the leaves are blowing.